Summer Random Kid Quote - Day 1.75

(Hunter)  Mom, I have  discovered the ultimate weapon. If I smile big and get sun on my braces, I can beam the sun on people and burn them. Like this.....

(Me)  Ack! My eye!

Hell Hounds

Behold the hounds from Hell.

Remember watching the Lost Boys back in the day. It took many many years to look at Keifer and not see fangs. Or look at rice and not see maggots. Or to think of hell hounds in any other way that those snarly nasty mangy freaky K9s. 

Well, let lose the demons because the hounds from hell reside in Acampo! 

Molly didn't quite cut it with us. When I said she was her

e to stay, well.... just to stay over like an extended slumber party. She's gone. She ate her poop. I mean devoured it. One night while my dad and grandma were visiting, Molly's little gut decided it needed to purge. This night gave diarhea of the mouth a whole new meaning to me. No one likes to wake up at 2am to the not so sweet mouth of re-gurged turd. 

So 2 am, we're scrubbing carpet, gagging, freezing with patio doors wide open and th

e ceiling fans on, and Mike get his diarhea of the mouth (not really turd 

mouth, but potty mouth). "you effen B" "You piece of Shhhhheeeet" (only I'm cleaning up his words for this post) "you worthless no good B"... Well, you get what I'm saying. Me, I'm laughing so hard wondering what my dad and grandma are thinking is going on, and how I could let him speak to me that way. 

So the next weekend, Molly goes bye-bye in my boss' car for a trip far far away. Brave of me to hand off yuck mouth to the man who does my reviews and evaluates my raises. I did come clean, and let him know what the issue was, so I did cover my arse. Any whooo, he loves her to pieces. He scoops poop more than we did, most likely. They're so happy together.

So back to the hell hounds, like it could get worse. 

Well, Mike was ready for a new lab. His fool wife actually believed 2 is easier than 1, 

because it will have playmate. Sierra will be happy because she's too old to deal with an annoying puppy. Boy am I lame. 

Double the annoying puppy attacks on Sierra. They tag team attack her while she is resting. 

Double the poop to scoop (which luckly neither has acquired the hankering to munch).

Double the expense.

Double the destruction to the home. 

Double Trouble!!!

I swear, Austin and Hunter in K9 form. Wonder twins 

activate.. "in form of amazingly annoying, psychotic, destructive puppy" "in form of amazingly annoying, psychotic, destructive puppy twin". 

Although to the boys' defense, they are not annoying, just psychotic and destructive. Oh and the go potty in the toilets, not on the lawns (well #2 anyways). 

We picked up Buddy the day after Thanksgiving. He's the blond demon. He was born 9/30. Shasta came home at 6 and a 1/2 weeks the Sunday before Christmas. Such a little dink. Buddy thought she was a squeaky toy until she bot back. She's so EEEEvile. She kicks his and Sierra's butt in 3 seconds flat. Hunter adores Shasta and Buddy is Austin's yellow shadow. Every boy should have a dog. And every mom should drink heavily (or at least invest in Miss Clairol for the multiple dyes to cover the new greys).

But isn't life more fun with twins boys, and puppies?

Never a dull moment. 

Happy valentines. 

The Courage to Love and Whip in October

Halloween is a coming, and I'm flippin' freakin out! I love Halloween! I finally nagged Mike enough that he took the Halloween decorations out of the attic "now will you shut-up about it already?" Nope, so sorry to say that I won't. Because now I'm complaining that all of the Halloween decorations fit in one box. I need more, I tell you, more! I think I will be doing a little patriotic spending this week to help boost the economy (and my Halloween spirit). 

This year I have a Boba Fett and an Indiana Jones in residence. Actually, right now just an Indiana Jones in training. We normally order our costumes online, but Indy's hat held up the delivery date. So yesterday we went to Ooga-Booga and found an Indy hat and whip combo. I cancelled the online order for the hat and whip (saving $20.00 - yippee more to help get my Halloween decoration fix) and the order for the rest was shipped today. I usually plan to get costumes early enough that the boys have plenty of rips and holes in their costumes come Halloween. Actually, Hunter still wears costumes from Halloweens past all through out the year. We love costumes. 

Now back to Indy. Or really back to Indy's bull whip. Mini-Jones has whipped everyone and everything in this house, garage, yard, store...... It's made out of some plastic earth destroying material that really keeps it from hurting when it makes contact with it's victims. It's really pretty good. Problem is, Mini-Jones is getting better. Evil child. I love it. He's been running around the house with his Indy hat and whip, and even slept with them last night. Sierra is the only one spared from the whippings. 

Soooo, what did Hunter sleep with? A rubber chicken. Yes, a plucked, rubber, funky chicken. He loves that chicken. I think it had feathers before Austin whipped them all out one by one, but Mike assures me that it was naked and funky from the start. 

Austin lost his first tooth, FINALLY.  He's had his 4 front teeth lose for over a year. Finally one fell out in his sleep last night. Maybe he accidentally whipped it out. He's so stoked to get some cash from the Tooth Fairy. I told him to hang the whip up for the night or she may be too scared to approach. He didn't buy it and told me she wasn't a chicken like me. Then proceeded to compare me with the naked funky rubber chicken, which offended Hunter more than me.

I'll get my revenge, I spent some of my costume re-purchasing savings today and bought a big skeleton which is laying in Austin's bed right now, waiting for him to go to bed, much to his surprise. Ofcourse it may backfire and the tooth fairy will be putting money under my pillow where little man will sure to be sleeping after the freak out from Grim resting on his pillow. It'll be worth it, though. I can hardly wait for the freak-out scream fest. 

After soccer practice we pull up to the house and Hunter tells me he wishes it was Valentines day every day of the year. Austin, who thinks he is 15, says "well that sucks". And so the argument begins. 

H - Valentine Rocks!

A - Yuck!

H - But Austin, Valentine's is all about love, compassion and courage!

A - Yuck!

Mom - Oh Hunter, you have such a beautiful heart!

A - Yuck!

H - Thanks, mommy, I love you (followed by big mushy kiss)

A - You guys make me want to puke. Where's my whip?

Mom and Hunter take off screaming, in search of a safety zone.

Funny, how we lose the Valentine courage when we see the whip. 

Have a happy, funky chicken, whippin' good Halloween!

To Do, Or Not To Do

I've been double tagged, I know, I know. Just buried in work and summer fun. I'll respond to the tag on my next post. For now I will leave you with the summer To Do list we have going on. More like save face on all my parenting faux paus:

Learn to play guitar.

Well start lessons anyway, and they have. Lesson #2 was today. They have graduated from Hot Cross Buns and Mary Had a Little Lamb to Old McDonald, on the 2nd lesson. I was told within the 1st 5 minutes of Austin's lesson that he is a "Natural". Natural at what, I still don't know.

Learn how to swim.

Yes, bad mom and dad have 6 year olds with no swimming capabilites. They took lessons one year, but still, no can do. Last year Austin had the broken arm all summer. Hunter, well Hunter just doesn't want to do it. So we signed them up for semi-private lessons. Hopefully this will work out for some basics. They start the class 07/02.

Learn to tie shoes.

In the world of velcro straps and Vans slip ons I have failed to teach my kids how to tie their shoes. Being that they will now be big 1st graders, I believe it is time they learned. Or more like time for me to take the time to teach them how. Anyone have any good teaching tips, or silly rhymes to make it happen?

Read everyday.

Any favorite titles for 6 year olds? I've been reading to them the A to Z Mysteries. That and Nate the Great were their 1st "chapter books", other than the bible, which Austin read all the time. Austin could read them, but to hold Hunter's attention, I'm reading them. It's great watching them trying to solve the mystery before they really know it will end. Then they both have to read me a book of choice. The school library is open every Thursday and they check out up to 2 books and get to take the AR reading tests for raffle tickets. They're not quite ready for Harry Potter, but ready for something more adventurous than Go Dog Go.

Do something fun away from the house every week.

Yes, bad mom, totally need to be remind myself of that. Between work and life, I seem to forget to get the kids out of the house and be adventurous. The good thing about working from home is no need for a sitter, I'm home all day with the kids. The bad thing about working from home is I'm always at work. It's so hard to tear myself away when I know work is just right there needing to be done. So far we went to Disneyland and we went to Santa Cruz. Although they were both during the 1st week of vacation, I gave myself credit for 2 weeks of gettaways. I know, I cheated, but we had unexpected impromtu partay at the house on Saturday with a butt-load of kids destroying my home, so I think we can count that as a day at the zoo. Plan to get to San Francisco and hit the Exploratorium before the summer is up. Plus a train ride from Lodi to Sacramento and the Train Museum, since we have annual membership and have only gone once this year.

Teach Hunter how to ride 2 wheel bike.

He has no interest to do it, and no trust in Mike and I teaching him. He's never trusted us if there was the slightest possibility of bodily harm. Even if I threaten bodily harm. Ummm, I would never do that, but then again, you never know. I love riding my bike and so does Austin, but it really cramps our style to wait for Mr. 4 wheeler peddaling a la stiff backed Alice behind us. And not having any sidewalks in the neighborhood, but rocky asphalt, it just seems safer for him to ride 2 wheels. I think Maryann will get a "crash" course this summer, too. They can both lay in bed and heal together from all the "ooops I didn't mean to let go" accidents that come their way.

Well, that is my To Do list for the summer. Yes, it all revolves around the boys. I do have other things that I want to tackle personally, but that can wait until fall. Right now, I just want them to have a really great 1st summer vacation. Next year's To Do list will just be a chore list. Trying to figure my way around some of the child labor laws, but that's the nice thing about being in the country, no one can hear you screaming for help.

So what are your plans for the summer?

Mo-Hogs and Chicks

So what do you do the 1st time your son requests a hairstyle? You let him do it? Oh yes, you do. Austin for months has been cutting his hair short, save for the bangs, so he can gel them up. So GQ. Hunter, really hasn't cared what his hair looks like. Until now. It started as a joke, but as soon as he saw it in the mirror he said "Don't change a thing!" WE talked him in to letting us clean it up, but alas, the Mo-Hog is here to stay.

Monday conversation at school between Hunter and a little girl in the class.

Girl: So Hunter, why did you get a Mohawk?

Hunter: Because the chicks dig it. (not really, but in essence, yes)

Real Hunter: So the girls will love me, do you love me?

Girl: Uh, NO! (In the whole what-EVAH tone)

Shortly after it was snack time/recess, and who do you think sat together to eat? Litlle miss No-No couldn't get any closer to Hunter without sitting on his lap. Yup, I'm breeding stud-muffins. All the chicks dig those bad boys, even the kindy-garden ones.

Tae Kwon DON'T

This is where I would normally have some cute picture of my kids. But there are none. Well....there are tons, just none related to this story. See the boys went last Saturday for their 1st Tae Kwon Do lesson. I figured, the camera could stay home until they get to don the cute little pajama uniforms with the belt and all. Smart school, they start off with 2 free private lessons to provide an intro for the kids, then they assess what class level the little ones should be in. I believe it is to assess the instructor's patience level with kindergarteners.

1st lesson, teen pimple black belt learns no matter how much he has mastered his mind and body, he was no where close to prepared for the Marcoccia boys. Uh, not even a smidgeon close to prepared. 10,000 Star Wars questions before they hit the mat. Twin A punching teacher out of turn, as teacher was looking at Twin B. Twin B performs upright epileptic fit, which he truly believed were jumping jacks. Twin A spin kicking in the air, when there was to be no kicking in the lesson. Twin B going to the restroom and leaving the door open for all to watch. Twin A closing the door on Twin B without turning on the lights, leading into Twin B screaming bloody murder fit (much like jumping jacks without a smile).

Results were, "Boys, you have one more chance for next Wednesday. You need to learn in the next week how to focus, answer always with 'Yes Sir' or 'No Sir', no talking out of turn and listen to my instructions." Teen pimple black belt turns to me, "Ma'am, your boys will need to learn some discipline and focus before next weeks visit, or they will not be able to return". Mom: "Why in the heck do you think I brought them here?" (Exact words, question left unanswered).

Sooo, Wednesday I am flying to Chicago and you better believe my camera is going with me. Mike is taking the boys, but I can't find the charger for the old camera. In otherwords, there may be no pictures of the boys being told to Tae Kwon DON'T.

Back From a Galaxy Far, Far Away

We're baaaack. The trip to LA was a blast. The Science museum was really cool. http://www.californiasciencecenter.org/ We saw an IMAX film about the Deep Sea creatures, narrated by Johnny Depp and Kate Winslet. Then we went in. Way cool exhibit. So much to see and do and touch. I could have been lost in there for hours, but the boys (Hunter) had thoughts of Star Wars gift shop on the brain.

I got a bit hooked on Guitar Hero. What a fun game. So glad I don't own it or I would really get nothing done. At one point Serafina was challenging Austin, and as he was jamming he said "I sure hope I catch the Rock n' Roll spirit". Rock on, little dude!

Really cool to see Audrey and family. I can't believe how grown up the kids are. Easter egg coloring and hunting was so cool. And just the interaction between all the kids was really cool. I'm real happy we made the time to get down there and can hardly wait for the next time.

An April Fool and a Mandarin Pixie

Hooray for April Fool's Day! The boys loved that it was April Fool's Day. They woke up with almost the same excitement and anticipation of Christmas. They tried to fool us all day with "you're shoes are untied" to "There's a spot on your shirt". I love that they have a sense of humor and found the day to let that prankster humor lose about as exciting as getting a present from Santa.

Speaking of Fools, you can see this fool's latest layouts in the Mandarin Pixie (http://MandarinPixie.com/) gallery. The shop owner, Jennifer, asked me to be the Guest Design Team member for April. Great fun! I loved her stamps, great fonts, easy to use, cool selection. You can see my layouts in her gallery, but here's one teaser for you, plus one more that is not in her gallery because I used her stamps for the IDOS Design Team challenge for March:

In the "Pretty in Pink" layout, I used a number 8 from her Piqued Alphabet to frame the sides of the picture of Serafina. In the "Con Papi" layout, I used the Pupcat alpha for the SF. Like I said, check her store out, good stuff.


Ok, time for an old fool to finish up some work and hit the hay. The boys are spending the night at our neighbor friend's house, so I get to sleep until my body tells me it's enough. WOO HOO!!!

Faith

H:"Austin, can I tell you something? I love God, I love Santa, I love my flambily and I love Money, but do you know who I love the most?"
A:"Who?"
H:"God. You want to know why?"
A:"Why?"
H:"Because he built this world for us to live in."
A:"You know, I think we're going to be true Jedis."
H:"Yes, I think so, too."

A conversation between the boys about 2 minutes ago as they play on the computer. This one makes me happy, well, not the money part, but shamefully, it usually works in that order. Just happy that Flambily came 3rd in the top 4.

We're Catholics. However, you never see us in church. We eat meat on Fridays during lent. My forehead has no ashes on it on Ash Wednesday. We only say Grace before holdiday meals with family. I can't remember ever going to confesion. But Mike and I have a strong sense of faith. We feel closer to God in the outdoors, surrounded by nature. And when I lay next to my children to read to them, I feel it was faith that helped me get there. Faith in God, faith in modern medicine, faith that it would work, faith in Mike and my marriage. We may not be the most visible worshipers, but we never ever lose faith.

So hearing my children so freely talk about God makes me happy. I've never pushed religion on them. However, the only chapter book we have read through more than once is the Children's Bible. By choice we have read through 2 different versions in their entirity, twice each. And when they pray, they always pray for others and not themselves. They always add the sick kids, the hungry kids, and the little kids that need love to the list of flambily and pets and friends to be blessed. Austin plays hide and seek and chess with Jesus. Austin tucks a few of his favorite reads under his pillow at night, and a bible is always one of the pack. Hunter always talks about God and Jesus as if they were good friends. Jesus may be flying a space ship with Hunter in a Star Wars battle one minute, or counting to 30 while Austin is hiding the next.

I love those images they have of God and Jesus. That he is their friend, not something to fear. I've always disliked the term "God Fearing". Why should we fear God? If we're good people, and good to each other, and love and respect one another, what is there to be afraid of? That is what I want my children to grow up with. Be honest, respectful, have love and have faith in your heart. So when I listen to conversations that happen between 2 brothers in their room as they play games together, I sit and just smile. I have faith that Mike and I are on the right path to raising 2 wonderful men.

So pray on, little dudes. Talk to Him like a friend.

All Grown Up and Ready to Rock!

So, my little boys are big 6 year olds now. I'm having a real hard time with it. I don't know why, just am. So grown-up, so independent, so opinionated. Just how I want them to be, but just not yet. Well, they got spoiled this year. Tomorrow is the big party at some party jump-house place. Fun for all. Today was the real spoiling, though. Mommy and Daddy love to spoil them, so here is what they got for their birthday:



Hunter had a hard time with finding the courage to take a ride. Austin told him, "Hunter, if you ride the bike, I'll let you be in my band".. That worked. LOL Guess it's time for music lessons.