What a dork!

So, I go to Target. I love that store, but sometimes their staff are not quite up to my standards. I have very low standards, by the way. So, the Fiorucci line is on sale, 30% off!! I've been wanting these pants, so I buy pants, a shirt, a jacket... I had gone in there to buy a journal for an online creativity class I am taking. I buy these clothes along with my journal and some cleaning supplies (that's where my neighbor told me I went wrong). Any whoo, when it's time to leave there, I'm rushing to get the boys by 12:30 and it's now 12:40. It's Friday and our Friday routine involves me picking the guys up early, going to Mickey D's to buy them McFlurries and me a 3 point Parfait. We go home and watch cartoons and play video games until Daddy's home and hounds us for being vegetables. I love Fridays. I digress, yet again. This is just how my brain works. Scarry, huh? Soooo, going through the check stand I'm rushing. I put all my stuff from my cart in the back of the car, along next to some snow chains and a bunch of jackets, and whatever lurks in the back of my car. As I'm pushing the cart to the mid-lot cart corral, I remember a time I left a case of beer under the basket for some happy teens, I'm sure, to discover. I look in my cart again to make sure I left nothing in it, and I'm safe there. I run, get the boys, get the McFlurries minus a Parfait because I decided I needed a real lunch I could make at home (Natural Doritos and a Lipton Green Tea Citrus qualifies as a real lunch). We settle down at home just in time for Dora and Diego's Big Adventure. I bring some of the stuff in the house, and leave some in the car. We had company that evening. Charlie and Dee Dee. For those who don't know them, they are ex-neighbors who moved to the hills, which I will never forgive them for, but will love them anyway. They are more like family, and great friends. Dee Dee was even there for the boys' birth, and several of the pre-natal appts before that. To them she is like a grandma, along with the 3 others they already have biologically. About an hour and a pizza later, I decide I want to show Dee Dee my new kickin' pants. They are not in any of the bags. I tear apart the back of the car, the bags in the house. No sign of my pants and the pink shirt. I call Target and the little girl with the high voice that keeps calling me ma'am, already some major negative points against her, tells me the bag is not to be found and if I have my receipt, to call her back and they will research the security cameras, I will then get new pants and a shirt. I locate the receipts after again tearing apart the back of the car, bags and now my purse and center console, only to find it next to my checkbook on my desk. I call back and they said they would call back after security watches the tape. She calls back with that high squeaky obnoxious voice and tells me that "sorry MA'AM, but security says you took the bag, pink shirt and all". I want to reach through the phone and wring her squeaky toy, little neck. How violent of me, totally non-characterist. So I tell her, I will look again, but if I don't find it I will go down there and will ask to see that video for myself. I proceed to tell my friends all this, and they're all hot about it. Mike is totally irritated by it all, and jus keeps shaking his head. I go to my room, and go to put the jacket in the closet, only to spy my cute pink shirt and pants hanging already in there. Like I said, WHAT A DORK!! So, I walk out to show the outfit to my good friend Dee Dee, and face the laugh and ridicule that was sure to come. Martin and Sally and the girls came by later, only to join in on the ribbing. I will call back to apologize to squeaky toy, but man how embarASSing!